Some say, they saw the light. Others claim they knew their calling. I never understood what those phrases meant till I found mine. Over break I decided I would borrow my parents mini van and visit my family’s camp alone for one night. It’s a peaceful camp deep in the woods of northern New Hampshire that my family typically visits in the summer. It’s a great place to relax no matter the season. It’s also a great place for me to concentrate on my writing, which is exactly want I wanted to do.
After I settled in, I grabbed my journal and went outside to write. I sat at our picnic table free-writing all my thoughts hoping to create a story out of them. After the sun went down, it became a bit chilly. I had a thermal and a sweatshirt on, but it wasn’t enough. I made a fire and went back to my writing. I sat back to reflect on something I wrote. It was a small blurb about how quiet the world seemed even though I knew it was anything but. I put down my pen and looked into the fire. The flames mesmerized me, as I grew deeper into my thoughts. Then, in a matter of seconds it happened.
Thinking back on it, it must have been a wolf but I heard a howling scream. Some sort of being rose from the ashes of the fire, glared at me and disappeared, up in smoke, with the rest of the flames. My jaw dropped and I froze. Did I really see what I saw or was my imagination getting the better of me? I looked around to see darkness surrounding me. As much as I wanted to move, I couldn’t. I looked back at the fire and waited. I’m not sure for what, but I watched to see if anything would happen again. I probably only sat out there for another ten minutes but it felt like hours. I put the fire out and went into the cabin.
For a quiet place, the cabin was full of noise. The breeze kept sweeping across the screen door to make it thump into the doorframe. The floorboards creaked as I walked across them in the hallway. A drip from the kitchen facet kept hitting the metal sink. And the crickets chirping outside sounded like they were in surround sound. I’ve seen way too many scary movies just to stay and “inspect.” I grabbed all my things and closed up the camp. There was no way I was going to stay there alone with some weird being or extraterrestrial lurking.
I got into my parents van and drove home. Not home Plymouth, home parents home. I repeated the event over and over in my head. I wanted to chalk it up to a wild imagination but I couldn’t. Then I started to think about what I was going to say to my parents, “Hey Mom and Dad, yeah I decided not to stay up at camp because this ghost came up from the flames and interrupted my writing!” There was no way I could repeat what I saw. By the time I got home, it was late and my father was the only one awake. I walked into the house and he had a surprised look on his face, “I thought you went to camp.” “I was going to but I decided to spend the night at home instead.” He shrugged and didn’t say anything else. I went straight to bed with the evening’s events weighing on my mind.
The next morning when I awoke, I decided to speak to the one person in my town who would believe me the pastor. I called the church and made an appointment to speak with him. It’s no secret that I don’t care for Christian beliefs, but I needed to know about what I witnessed. I assumed he was the only man who could give me reason. When I arrived, he welcomed me with a happy hello and asked me to sit down in his office. The one thing I like about this man is he is no stranger to science. He believes in science and that it goes hand in hand with religion, not typical for his line of work. I looked him in the eye and explained the phenomenon I witnessed. He was quiet for a minute; so right away I assumed he thought I was full of it. I can’t say I blamed him. All he said was, “temptation comes to us in many disguises.” I asked what he was really getting at. He pretty much said it was probably a warning and I should think twice about the choices I make in life. I thanked him for his time and I left a bit irritated that I even bothered to go in the first place.
The next day, I thought about what the pastor told me. The more I thought about it, the more I thought he could be right. If there is a god, maybe it was trying to tell me something. Maybe the way I’ve been living my life is all wrong and I have been given a chance to try again. I thought back on the days when I went to Sunday school and why I never enjoyed it. It seems like maybe it was my misunderstanding and I wish I could start over. I’ve been leading a life of sin. I’m only grateful that my eyes have been opened. I’ve decided after I graduate, I’m going to study to be Carmelite nun. In this day and age, only a nun can be steered away from such spinster thoughts and to truly serve her one and only true master. A nun’s life is simple. Help other’s in need. Use sound judgment and common sense. Exercise good health. This life sounds right and a strong step to obtain mortal perfection. This brought such a smile to my face and a sense of peace. I even know where I want to study to become a Carmelite nun. I only hope they will accept me.
Then I about remembered that whole chastity thing. Happy April Fool’s Day.