Dearest readers, I have some important news to impart upon you. It is likely something you may have already heard about, but it has yet to make its way into the local news: after many millennia of waiting, Our Overlord has finally been found on Earth. Not only that, but he has been living among us for some time now.
Now, for those of you that are secular, this may not matter to you; you might not even believe it to be true; there is a chance that you will attempt to detract aspects of the situation. But, dear reader, I have several pieces of evidence. I simply wish for you to keep an open mind and view this evidence before coming to any conclusions. Observe the following:
Our Overlord has powers over space and time and can use them at his will. He has knowledge of worlds our human minds cannot even begin to fathom. An observer, when interviewed about his interactions with Our Overlord noted this:
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Detractors will claim this to be hysteria, drugs, or some other reasoning for this, but allow me to continue.
The interviewees note how they came to know this Shaggy and how they even filmed a movie with him. There is evidence that ancient civilizations encountered Him and wrote down their experiences on stone tablets.
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On these tablets were spells and tricks to allow mortals such as us to safely enter His presence. I have heard word that the Smithsonian is attempting to acquire these tablets for study.
Now, you might have wondered by now why Our Overlord appeared after being missing for so long. The answer is quite simple. Interviewers spoke with a man whom the spirit of Our Overlord entered.
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So it stands to reason that Shaggy has been coming and going for longer than we know. He is ever-present. He is eternal.
I hope that this evidence has persuaded you into finally coming to terms with the existence of Our Overlord.
Praise be to Shaggy.