Aries: You are every sign’s worst nightmare to work with because you don’t listen and you can’t stand being told what to do. It’s your way or the highway.Dream job: Firefighter
Taurus: You would never miss a day of work, because the only thing the bull cares about is the paycheck. Other signs soon learn to never cross your. You’re never asked to make a decision unless you have a month in advance and you never do anything outside of your job description.Dream job: Asset stripper
Gemini: You put a lot of energy into seeing that you get the maximum reward for the least amount of effort. You can deceive other signs into giving you any position you want. The twins’ lethal weapon is gossip, which will eventually make you the boss.Dream job: Tabloid journalist
Cancer: You always choose the darkest, dampest desk, which gives you a reason to whine. You like watching the other signs steal pens while you sit at your desk remembering everything they’ve ever said about you. Bosses like you because you work hard, and at the end of the day you feel superior.Dream job: Hermit
Leo: Whatever position you are in, you are the boss. You don’t get involved with gossip, but threaten other signs with their lives if they don’t report to you by noon. You appear to be a workaholic, but haven’t you seen what lions actually do all day?Dream job: Superstar
Virgo: You love working too much – if not for work, you would have to get a life. Bosses always love you, because you are ready in a moment’s notice. It’s not the paycheck, but the status and respect you crave. If the virgin is not valued, then taking revenge is the first priority.Dream job: Censor
Libra: You adore luxury and refuse to sweat for any of it. If you haven’t married rich or inherited money yet, you work – but barely. It doesn’t take more than tossing your hair for the boss to love you. You are lethal with acts of charm and manipulation. You’re the best at acting busy, even when you’re not. Things wouldn’t seem right if those scales were even, would they?Dream job: Politician
Scorpio: You have a reputation for being a workaholic, because you never let anything get in your way. Other signs, even your boss, tremble in fear of you. You keep your mouth shut and your head down while secretly getting top-secret information to start an evil corporate empire of your own. The scorpion loves revenge served cold.Dream job: Secret agent
Sagittarius: You love risky business. You are definitely not lazy – you will do anything, but never for long. You usually have three or four jobs at once. You get bored easily and leave. The other signs hate working with you because when even a second starts to drag by, you are mentally betting on which employees will burn longest when the building catches on fire. Which you will have nothing to do with, right?Dream job: Stunt double
Capricorn: You always make a point of being the first to work and the last to leave. The boss is impressed, which is the way you like it. Other signs feel threatened – even better for you. Your drive is for power, not glory. You don’t want to be the boss, but the person that makes all the real decisions because it will give you a chance to seek revenge on those who made your life hell before you climbed the greasy ladder.
Aquarius: Work? Are you serious? You have better things to do with your time. You always know what you’re talking about and bosses never argue with you. You are never on time. Bosses hate you because you can do the job ten times better in your sleep. Co-workers hate you because you spilled all the water cooler secrets while pretending to be nice. Dream job: Mad scientist
Pisces: You are an artiste, and no one ever understands. The job description says “janitor,” but in your eyes what that really means is “domestic engineer.” There is not much work you can do, because you’re always staring blankly at the wall for hours. When you are not praised for the imaginary “work” you do, all hell breaks loose.Dream job: World dictator