Duke Versus the World

Being a Duke fan is like being that one kid in your high school class that you thought just might be the most annoying person this side of the Mississippi. You know, that one you had in EVERY class, the one that thought they were your friend but really wasn’t. They’d sit next to you and hover over your notes, making sure everything they had was perfect while being annoying as possible about it. Kind of cocky, always in your face. They’d ask you what you got on your last test, and would always beat you by three or four points, even if you know they only studied for an hour and you studied for four. Loud and obnoxious, they’d always talk about the past; remember that time I got a 2300 on my SAT’s, remember that time Christian Laettner went to four straight Final Four’s, or that time they scored the highest physics grade in the school, or that time Coach K got his 1,000th win with the Blue Devils. You hate this kid. You hate him because he’s cocky, and he’s obnoxious, but most importantly because he’s good.

His team’s good.And he doesn’t let you forget about it.

I haven’t written a column since the Super Bowl, so I felt it fitting to write one this week; so far my teams are two-for-two in championship games in 2015. As always, controversy ensues, and although I can say that I was pumped that my teams came out on top, I am a fan of the sport first, the team second. In order to be a fan of college basketball, one must watch every game they can in March, and if you know anything about the past couple seasons for Duke, they don’t always come ready to perform in the big dance. In two of the prior three years, they dropped the first round games as both a number two and number three seed in their brackets, and are 0-3 all-time under coach K in championship games against teams who are the number one seed in their respected bracket. Coming into every March Madness tournament as a Duke fan means that you get more crap than any other fan. I actually have a friend who went out and bought a Lehigh University shirt after they upset Duke three years ago, and he send me a picture of him wearing it before every first round game Duke plays. My roommate watched every game with me, and was practically every opponent’s biggest fan when I was in the room. Doesn’t have a clue about college basketball, the poor sap. With all the heckling comes all the bets, as well. I won $30 off my father alone this year, just in the last two games of the tourney, and another $50 from friends back home that root for rival North Carolina. 

And, of course, the media critics. ESPN’s First Take had the best argument this year between Skip Bayless and Stephen A. Smith, in debating whether or not the refs were to blame for the huge run in the final ten minutes of the game, where the Blue Devils outscored Wisconsin by 14 points. If you type Duke-Wisconsin into Google, you’ll see three headlines that basically cover the first eight search page results; whether or not the refs saw Justise Winslow touch the ball going out of bounds, how Grayson Allen is THE man, and Coach Mike Krzyzewski’s response to Wisconsin head coach Bo Ryan saying that Duke doesn’t play by the rules.

Bo Ryan’s a jealous idiot. I don’t care WHO you are, as a coach, you don’t criticize another organization. For those who don’t know why I’m being so hostile, Ryan was quoted as saying that his program doesn’t do “rent-a-player,” criticizing Krzyzewski’s program of having top high school recruits come play for his organization for a year before being drafted into the NBA, unlike his program which hasn’t won s*!t since like 1941. Literally. 

Well, there you have it. Duke won, you lost. I’ve always been a loudmouth (Editor's note, you aren't a loudmouth compared to me -E$), but now you get to hear me tell the world how awesome Duke is for the next 360 days. I’d like to write another one of these for the Stanley Cup, but I have a hunch that my Bruins won’t make it.  We’ll see.